Book Review: "Good Talk" by Mira Jacob

Packing an emotional, powerful punch, Mira Jacob's Good Talk is a great read!!

The book is subtitled A Memoir in Conversations, and that’s exactly what it is. It recounts conversations that the author had at different points in her life with her husband, family, friends, her young son, people she dated, even strangers, about race, identity, prejudice, racism, and love.

Most of the conversations with her son occur in the lead-up to the 2016 election, as she tries to help an eight-year-old process the things Donald Trump said, the unease of many yet the embrace of many as well of his candidacy for president and the things he espoused, and what all of it would mean to a young Indian boy.

She also recounts snippets of post-9/11 life in New York City for a brown woman, what dating was like, the hope that came from President Obama’s election, and ultimately, the emotional realities of being in an interracial marriage, particularly in the Trump era.

This is gorgeously emotional and so thought-provoking. To read Jacob’s thoughts as a woman, an artist, a mother, a wife, and a woman of color in both good and tumultuous times was really eye-opening.

I didn’t know when I first started hearing about this book that it was a memoir of sorts told in a graphic novel-style, but in a tongue-in-cheek way. The pictures are hand-drawn or are actual photos and they’re superimposed on different backgrounds, so it almost looks like the start of a collage. I love it but don’t want people to be caught off-guard. I've seen some people comment on that, but it didn't bother me at all.

You’ve got to read this.

Book Review: "Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic" by Alison Bechdel

Family dysfunction, bow down to the Bechdel family.

Alison Bechdel's father Bruce was an enigma to her while she was growing up—an English teacher and director of the family-owned funeral home (aka the "Fun Home") who had an exacting eye for fashion, decor, and gardening. He wasn't a bad father, but he always seemed to keep her and her brothers at arm's length, not to mention her mother.

While Alison remembered some special, tender times, she remembered more moments of being forced to wear an outfit she didn't want, scolded into meeting his tough cleaning standards, and feeling bewildered at his obsession with making sure all of the flowers around their house always looked perfect.

When Alison was in college, she came out to her parents as a lesbian. Shortly thereafter, she found out that her father was gay. While perhaps not entirely surprising if she added up all of the signs and clues she might have noted subconsciously, the discovery still throws her for a loop. And while they had one half-conversation about this, a few weeks after his revelation, her father died, leaving a legacy of mystery and confusion in his wake.

"Perhaps my eagerness to claim him as 'gay' in the way I am 'gay,' as opposed to bisexual or some other category, is just a way of keeping him to myself—a sort of inverted oedipal complex."

Fun Home is both a daughter's efforts to make sense of her father's life and death as it is an account of growing up uncomfortable in your own skin, of knowing you are different but being afraid of acknowledging it for fear everything might change, even though it should. It's a story of coming to terms with who you are, while remembering a man who really never had that luxury.

I'm really late to the party in reading this, and while I've heard some of the music from the musical version of Fun Home, I never saw the show either. I've never read a graphic novel/memoir before (although I read lots of Archie, Betty, and Veronica comics growing up, and was addicted to the Silver Surfer), and this was both a refreshing and challenging format for me.

This book practically pulsates with emotion, anger, and confusion, as well as the uncertainty that comes with self-discovery. When it dealt with Alison's own life or her father's struggles to find himself, the book is strongest, but it spends a lot of time holding up their story against a backdrop of classic literature (which her father so loved), and after a while I didn't enjoy those portions as much. However, as someone who wishes his father was still alive so we could have conversations about life there never seemed to be time for then, I found Fun Home beautifully moving.

If you mostly read books via Kindle or another e-reader, do yourself a favor and borrow or buy the printed version of this one. I was so glad I made the investment to enjoy the power of how Bechdel's illustrations told as much of the story as her words. While this wasn't perhaps as good as I had expected it to be, it still is powerful, and I'll remember it for some time to come.