“For some of us, there comes a moment when we realize that the object of our desire lies outside our known world, beyond our towns and families. Out there, we understand, there is another way to want, to have, to be. Sometimes, even when we do not venture out to find it, when we try to want only what we are given, the object comes to us. And the world, without our consent, breaks open and expands.”
It’s the summer of 1984 in the small town of Swaffham, Massachusetts. Thirteen-year-old Mel (short for Melanie) will start high school in the fall, so she plans to spend the summer with her best friend Jules, riding their bikes around town, avoiding their parents, and getting into mischief.
One day she sees Sylvia, a strong woman with bravado, who reminds her of Joan Jett. She is utterly transfixed by Sylvia, strange feelings for Mel. Then she learns that Sylvia is a trans woman—a choice not particularly popular in Swaffham. But Mel is drawn to Sylvia, who takes her under her wing, which causes trouble with her mother and Jules, among others.
In 2019, Mel is now Max, a trans man whose teaching career is in jeopardy because he still thinks of things with more traditional labels. He returns to Swaffham to deal with his depression and clean out his late mother’s house, but being home triggers many memories and traumas.
This is a powerful and moving book that definitely may trigger some people. It shifts back and forth between the 1980s and 2019, and looks at the personal dynamics of a teenager struggling with their sexual and gender identity and dealing with how different they are from their friends. It also looks at how, in the present, there are some who struggle with a person who is confident in their own gender if it doesn’t fit their own views of the world, family or no, and it provides perspective on how societal thinking shifts and changes.
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